Date Tomorrow Night

It is kind of a blind date for me, but not for the young lady. I am always really busy with my Danse stuff and everything so I don't go out on too many dates, but I got a call this morning from one of the entertainers from Open Mic show last night. Evidently she liked what she saw, because she wants to get together for dinner tomorrow night. I wasn't paying very much attention to the other performers, so I don't remember her, but I am looking forward to our date.

"Open Mic Night" Not Really Open

So I wandered into The Dregs coffee house yesterday and there was a sign on the door for "Open Mic Night tonight. Music and Performance Art." Naturally, I went back that night. By the time I figured out what was going on, about 15 people had signed up ahead of me, so I waited and watched all of these very angry women play guitar and sing about all of their failed relationships. The scene was not what I would call cheery (and it was easy to see why their relationships failed) but I felt it was a good vibe for the Blues Danse. When my turn finally came up, I decided to do an a capella danse number - no music. Since it seemed like each of the other performers sang three songs at about five minutes apiece, I selected a routine that was 15 - 20 minutes in length. First, a few in the audience kept clapping during the natural pauses in the routine. Then, after only ten minutes the dude who introduces everyone tried to interrupt my number by telling me, "time's up, let's wrap it up." Finally, one of the pissed-off chicks came up and pushed me off the stage. It was incredibly rude, but suddenly everyone was clapping loudly and cheering, so I guess they liked me. I might go back there next Thursday night.

Blues Danse Defined (Part 6)

On Wednesdays we devote a little time to discuss our favorite topic, Blues Danse. Today, we do a scientific comparison of three different types of dance (or Danse):

Why Didn't I Think of That?

You know when someone comes up with an idea or product that is so brilliant that - as soon as you hear about it - you just want to spank your own butt for not thinking of it first? I had one of those experiences today. There are many pieces of equipment that a Blues Danser uses but this is one of those products that I have been waiting for, practically all of my life. And I didn't even know it. Awesome is one of those words that is so overused that it's real meaning has been diluted. An awesome thing actually causes one to be stricken with awe. Today, I was awe struck. Drum roll please.....

....I really can't do it justice, so please check it out for yourself. Awesome. Just awesome.

I Am My Own Victim

I apologize for not posting anything for the past couple of days. I was in no mood to write. In fact, I didn't even go near the computer. I pretty much just sat on my couch and nursed my bruises. You see, late Friday night I was the victim on a brutal stubbing. And as much as my toes hurt, my ego was bruised even more. I practically wrote the book on apartment/danse studio etiquette, but I broke my own rule and paid dearly for it. The details are not important. Let's just say I was too tired and lazy to turn on a light and, on the way to the bathroom, decided to zwirl in the pitch blackness of the room. I still get a little sick to my stomach when I think about the pain. But I am limping around now and I am healed enough to get back to work.

These Attacks Are Getting Old

Don’t you hate it when you walk into a room and are unexpectedly and viciously attacked by a cockatiel? It just happened to me again over the weekend. I had to go to the walk-in clinic and get a stitch in my ear lobe. I didn’t know you could get just one stitch. This makes the fourth bird attack that I have suffered in my lifetime; three from cockatiels and one from a hummingbird. The first two times were at my Nanna’s place. Her cockatiel, Son-of-Sammy, was so possessive that I could never go near my Nanna without some kind of incident. Son-of-Sammy actually drew blood twice. Then there was the time I was enjoying brunch on a lovely outdoor patio when a hummingbird repeatedly dive-bombed me. It escalated to the point where I had to leave the table. There were nine people in our group and I was the only one attacked. Finally, there was this latest incident on Sunday with Tom Cruise, a Flaming Blue (cockatiel) belonging to my neighbor. The antibiotics seem to be killing the infection but the whole area is still petty bruised and have to sleep on my back.

Giving Back to My Community

As a community service, I am providing 160 hours of free Danse instruction for kids from poor neighborhoods in my area. Some of these kids are already talented dancers. They have spent hours dancing with friends and teaching each other different moves, but they lack formal training. That is where my community service comes in. We have a little trouble understanding each other because most of them have fairly strong accents, even though they have been in Anaheim since birth. They normally dance to music with a very strong beat. They called it hip hoc music. I thought that it might be good work up a Blues Danse routine to some hip hoc but none of kids had a cassette tape with the hip hoc tunes (they are all going with the CDs these days) and my time is pretty limited since I only have to do 160 hours of community service. No problem, though. We'll just use my regular music tapes.

Blues Danse Defined (Part 5)

On Wednesdays we devote a little time to discuss our favorite topic, Blues Danse. Our focus today is mental preparation.

Everyone knows that a skilled Blues Danser must be physically prepared for every performance, but some underestimate the importance of being mentally prepared as well. I believe that a well-rested mind is critical to a good performance. I personally achieve the proper mental rest through a specialized form of meditation that I call the Couch and TV method. I find that, if I lie on the couch and turn on the TV, my mind begins to settle. My eyes close as I move into a meditative state. Most of the time I lose track of time completely and when I come back to consciousness I find that it has been two hours or more. I have made this meditation a habit. Even during the weeks or months when I don’t have a scheduled performance, I try to meditate in this fashion each afternoon.

I Love Being a Teacher

Being a Danse teacher has many rewards. Working with the kids helps to keep me young. By watching them interact and listening to their speech, I learn the latest lingo and it helps me to stay in touch with the kids while I teach them Blues Danse. We learn from each other. For example, when they say, “this danse move is bad,” they actually mean the move is good. When they say, “that girl looks hot,” they really mean she looks good. It has nothing to do with her temperature. I know this because I verified it with the kids. And when they say, “you look ridiculous in those shorts,” they mean that I look good in these shorts. Maybe even hot. A lot of times, kids can see the plain truth much more easily than adults.

The Zwirl

Many dancers twirl. I don’t twirl. Why? Because I have elevated the twirl to a new level of subtle complexity. In fact, what I do should no longer be referred to as a twirl at all. I call my move the zwirl. Check out my video demonstration of the zwirl. Ordinary dancers twirl. Blues Dansers zwirl.

Time Change Change: Nobody Told Me!

What happened? Since when can the President just change the time of day? And why didn't the TV news report this beforehand? I have, like, three different clocks that I have to change this morning - not including my watch - and I just now realized that I missed breakfast! On Sundays, I always drive thru Niko's for Apple Flapjack Falafels - which they stopped serving at 10:30. I could have made it there for breakfast if the President hadn't changed the time without warning anyone and now I am starving, because I should have eaten an hour ago. Just when the guy is winning everyone's confidence, he pulls a stunt like this. Maybe it's just the hunger talking, but I don't think I am going to vote for this guy next time.

Talk About Multi-Talented!

Who is it that everyone has on their iPod? Who is one of the great dancers of our time? Who could easily have retired years ago on the money that he made from his hit songs but chooses instead, to keep performing live shows for his adoring fans? Two words. Vanilla Ice. Do we call him Vanilla for short? Do we call him Ice? Or Van, or Illa? I think I'll call him La Ice. Here is a man who has never stopped entertaining the crowds. In fact, La Ice is performing tonight at Antones club in Beaumont, TX. He has a recent record that he chose to put on a small label and distribute over the Internet, rather than to line the pockets of some major record company. Buy his CD here. But his music is just the beginning. La Ice is also a motocross rider...

And he is a tax expert, as well as a philatelist. So La Ice or Vanilla or Ice? Keep living the dream and, whatever else you do, never stop dancing. Word to your Mother.

Celebrity Sighting: Burl Ives!

Late last night I had to make an emergency trip for ice cream and just as I was getting out of my car I caught a glimpse of someone in the shadows and I did a double-take. It was Burl Ives! He is a famous performer of all kinds of great songs. Most people remember him as Sam the Snowman on Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer. I always loved that show and my parents had his records when I was a kid. I approached him very politely and said, "Mr. Ives, I am a huge fan. Could I take a snapshot of you for my blog?" I guess he is getting pretty old, because he just gave me a weird look and walked away. It was still cool to meet him, though.

[Update] I have just been informed that Burl Ives unfortunately passed away in 1995. That explains why the guy last night didn't let me take his picture. Our thoughts and prayers are with the Ives family.

Clot Can't Stop Dick

I read that Dick Cheney has a clot in his leg. He looks like it smarts pretty good. I guess he was told that he is OK to keep working. It really makes me think. What if I got some kind of clot in my leg? I practically make my living with my legs. What good is a dancer with bad legs? That was a rhetorical question. I wonder how much it would cost to get my legs insured against clots? I was never good with civics; if Dick's clot got really bad, who would step in to run the country?

Blues Danse Defined (Part 4)

On Wednesdays we devote a little time to discuss our favorite topic, Blues Danse. Our focus today, is the use of stage props in Blues Danse.

Professional dancers understand the importance of using stage props in their act. A cane or whip or other object can play an important role in communicating the choreographer's vision. I have recently been working with live props, which are like any other props except that they are alive. While live props - when used properly- can add dimension to a performance, they can also prove to be a real challenge. The best (or worst) example of this occurred recently. I was preparing for my annual Potable Water's One-Man President's Day Blues Danse Experience, where I had intended to include a live prop named Matt Samfort. Matt cleans my studio/apartment and I give him free Danse lessons in return. I decided that he was ready to do some back-up dancing (as a live prop) during my one-man show. In fact, I had planned to use him for most of the numbers, including the big finale, Everyone Mount Rushmore. I felt that we were rehearsed and ready and then, as if in some nightmare, my prop quit the show and the performance was postponed for an entire year! The lesson here, is that live props may not be worth the hassle, so be careful.

Never Mind, War Kids

This is sort of a Good News/Bad News story. Last week I posted an article about my plans for helping out some kids that I saw on TV who were in a war zone in one of the middle-eastern counties and also get a big mirror that I need for the danse studio. Well, the Bad News is that I have received zero donations for the mirror and kids. The Good News is that I was looking through the Penny Saver last night and I found a used mirror that I can get for free if I just come and get off of this guy's ceiling and haul it away! So I'm sorry kids, but the fund-raiser has been canceled.

Danse Performance Stellar: Crowd Just So-So

As promised, a few lucky attendees of Lonny Tungrotts 53rd Birthday party were treated to an incredible performance on Sunday. Potable Water’s One-Man Birthday Blues Danse Experience did not disappoint, although the crowd did seem to be a little unappreciative. Also, Beth's enclosed patio was not nearly as big as she described it so I had to change my routine at the last moment. When Beth asked me to do this huge favor, she said she would be happy to pay me; and she will tell you that she did pay me. So what happened? I guess I am partly to blame for not getting a signed contact from my "friend" before hand. It's just that I was in such a good mood after the performance and when Beth asked me how much I wanted, I was feeling pretty confident and I said, "just pay me what you think is fair." Well obviously she and I have two different ideas about what is "fair."

Lonny, I hope you had a great birthday and enjoyed the performance because I will not be back. Beth, you spent plenty of money on food and cheaped out on the entertainment. I guess we both know where your priorities are.

Blues Danse Shorts - 3/2/07

Blues Danse Shorts are random tidbits that I lump into a single, fact-filled article.

I was looking for a parking space yesterday and I scored a meter with 45 minutes left on it! The Meter Frau saw me pull into the space and walk away without dropping any coinage and she raced over, only to be disappointed by my good fortune. Why do so many so-called dance stores sell tights for women and not for men? Believe me, you will never catch me wearing women’s tights. That would just be wrong. No, I'm sticking with men's tights. The DDR (Dance Dance Revolution) game is broken at Grady’s Fun Zone. I had some time left to kill on my meter so I tried out the jet ski race game and this little 8 year-old kid kicked my butt in eleven straight races. I told her that she did not realize how lucky she was that DDR was broken because I would have taken her down on DDR. I would have made her cry like a little girl.

Help the War-Torn Children

One of the worst things about war is the toll that it takes on innocent children and I think that all world citizens have the obligation to help where they can. I need to get a really big mirror for my dance studio/apartment and they cost a lot more money than I thought they did ($300), so I was feeling a little sorry for myself until I saw a news story about the war in Iran or Iraq or somewhere. When I saw the plight of these children in this war zone, I though something has to be done.

So I am starting a collection to help out. I am going to be accepting donations for about a month, and I will collect as much money as I can. With the first $300, I am going to get my mirror and then I am going to give EVERYTHING ELSE to some charity that helps out kids in war zones.