Blues Danse Defined (Part 3)

On Wednesdays we devote a little time to discuss our favorite topic, Blues Danse. Today I will focus on fame and how to deal with the fans.

Back in the day, the old blues singers worked hard for very little money or fame. They did not have people asking for signatures or pictures. In fact, many of these amazing performers were treated as second class citizens. They had to eat in the kitchens of restaurants where they were performing and sometimes ride on the back of busses or in separate train cars. I guess it is just something about the Blues, because I find that I am treated just like any ordinary person, or sometimes worse. The other possibility is that my fans are so in awe of me that they somehow put me on a pedestal and are too nervous to approach me.

In any case, if someone did ask me for my autograph I would definitely give it to them unless I was trying to enjoy a meal.

DDR Supernova Redefined

Kids love DDR (Dance Dance Revolution). It is an interactive video game that challenges the player to repeat all of the dance moves in time to the music. The better you can keep up, the higher your score. I have discovered a way to turn Dance Dance Revolution into Danse Danse Revolution. You just fire up the game and groove out to the beat - but with your own Blues Danse moves! Sure, you'll end up with a crappy score but instead of playing games, you will be creating art.

[Update] Someone just told me that DDR is old news and the new "big thing" is Guitar Hero II. Well I say, Guitar Hero? More like Guitar Zero.

Pardon Me Your Highness!

I do not understand the dating scene these days. I mean, what is with the attitude of these women? I thought chicks dug athletes and bad boys and I qualify on both counts, but lately…nothing. Are you even listening to me honey? I said a Blues Danser, not a ballet dancer. The blues are for tough-guys. And if they would ever be patient enough to watch my entire routine, they would not be so quick to say such nasty things and then quickly leave the bar or party or grocery store or post office.

Dance Review: The Oscars

I'll keep this short and sweet. The Academy Awards ceremony this year featured NOTHING in the way of Blues Danse performance. That makes 79 years in-a-row. The one pleasant surprise for dance fans on Sunday night was that there was also none of that tap dancing drivel. Allow me to be generous:

Rating: 6 stars out of 30

Mother Makes Ultimate Sacrifice For Son

ANAHEIM - When Linda Hynee first took her son, Stuart for a free Blues Danse lesson and evaluation, she had no idea how important that day would be for them both. "I just figured it was a free lesson and Stuart had been trying to get me to sign him up for sports, so what the heck," said Hynee. "Who would have guessed that my kid was a natural born Blues Dancer." Linda's initial excitement turned to concern when she learned that young Stuart's lessons would require a rigorous daily schedule of afternoon lessons. "He has to be at his lesson at 2:00, which is the same time I like to watch Oprah, plus these lessons are really pretty pricey if you ask me, but I guess that's what happens when your son is a natural talent." Hynee has said privately, that she has gone back to work at Walgreens in order make ends meet. "I don't mind giving up my shows and working part time again. And I know that someday Stuart will come to realize how happy he is to be taking these lessons."

Blues Danse Q&A - Which Footwear?

So many people ask me about the correct costuming and protection for the aspiring Blues Danser. Today, the focus of our Q&A is men's footwear. This is actually not a difficult topic because I have very specific recommendations.

First, for basic Blues Grass Dansing, I always insist on Gold Toe brand men's black, over-the calf, basic support hose. I recently saw these on sale in three packs at JC Penney. Always remember; never perform Blues Grass Dansing on wet grass. And to clarify, the three packs of socks actually contain six socks (or three pairs of socks), so I guess that is sort of false advertising, but in a good way.

For Blues Danse on a wooden or linoleum surface, get Danshuz Mens Black Oxford Jazz shoe - model 4412. You can get these from Amazon for under 50 bucks. This shoe was not originally designed for Blues Danse, but it is the best thing currently available. The good news is that I have approached the Danshuz company, proposing my own design. It would be sold as the Potable Waters Signature model. I have not heard back from them yet but I will keep you posted.

This is Pure Gold!

I just had an awesome idea for a TV show that I know everyone will want to watch. I am sure that I could sell this concept to any Network but I do not know how to get a meeting so I am going to post the idea here and maybe someone with Network connections will see it and just might be able to help me out. And, this is officially dated today - 2/23/07 - so that no one can steal my idea. Are you ready? The show will be called:

Extreme Blues Danse Weekend

It is a reality show about an ordinary guy who is a Blues Danser (I would be that guy). The show is basically about my regular life, showing me getting up and doing everything from Danse rehearsals to cooking dinner. The extreme twist is that every Friday evening, a different Victoria's Secret model would show up at my place in a limo with, like, $25,000 and she would spend the night and then we would get up on Saturday and go around in the limo and we would not be able to go home until I spent every penny of that money on all kinds of cool stuff. It would be totally extreme. I am not certain how many Victoria's Secret models there are, but once every one had her turn we would just start back at the top of the list, so no worries about running out of them. And it could even be more money if 25K is not extreme enough. I am flexible on that point.

Men will love the show because of the hot models and all of the cool gadgets that I will be checking out and buying and women will love to get an inside peek at the life of a semi-professional Blues Danser and they can watch me go shopping. So if you have any pull at the Networks, please let them know I am ready to talk business!

Murder is Inexcusable, But Who Didn't See This Coming Eventually?

I was saddened to read about the deaths of these two performers. It is reminiscent of what happened to John Lennon, or maybe more like what happened to Dimebag Darrel. Well, not really like that either. I have known many people who harbor negative feelings about this type of entertainer, but I was still surprised at this story. It certainly makes no mention of them being tap dancers.

Blues Danse Concert Announced

When: Saturday, March 4th at 3:00 PM
Where: Lonny and Beth Tungrotts home
Why: Lonny’s 53rd Birthday
What: Potable Water’s One-Man Birthday Blues Danse Experience

Beth was good enough to think of me when planning Lonny’s big celebration. She's a big fan of Blues Danse. In fact, Beth was a student of mine for over four years until she finally realized that she was just too fond of the pies and cakes and was not willing to maintain the lifestyle that I demand of all my serious students.

Bad News: I saved it for last. Unfortunately, this concert will not be open to the public. So if you want to enjoy the Blues Danse Experince, you’ll have to get yourself invited to Lonny’s party.

Just Let it Die

Understandably, tap dancing has been on the decline for many years. In 1984, a 10-year-old kid named Savion Glover landed the leading role of the Broadway show The Tap Dance Kid. His moves impressed everyone and he has gone on to dance in a number of Broadway performances. He also won a Tony Award for his choreography, yada yada yada. Gregory Hines was the other contemporary tap dancer of note, but he saw the light long ago and branched out into acting before his unfortunate passing. So that leaves this Savion Glover who is still out there, “amazing” the crowds with his super fast tap dance moves. I just want to say, Dude, let it go. Everyone please move on. Tap had its day and now let’s let it die in peace. At this point, it only serves to confuse my audiences who are not savvy enough to recognize that my complex and subtle Blues Danse moves are not tap dance moves and should not be compared to this Glover guy. Sure, his moves have more pizazz but mine are way better. I think the guy is just jealous and that is why he won’t give it a rest. I am really just getting sick of this tap dance crap!

Blues Danse Defined (Part 2)

On Wednesdays we devote a little time to discuss our favorite topic, Blues Danse. Today I will focus on the many similarities between Blues Danse and the Marshal Arts.

To achieve excellence in the marshal arts requires the same level of commitment as that of a Blues Danser. It is more than a hobby or a form of exercise. It should be viewed as a way of life. The similarities between these two disciplines are notable. Both require hours of practice as the individual continually strives to push themselves further. Both recognize that their art informs a multitude of decisions made on a daily basis. Both require the personal involvement of a Master (teacher). But the connection between Blues Danse and Martial Arts that I find most compelling is what I call the Ralph Macchio Factor. Everyone recalls Ralph Macchio’s famous portrayal as Daniel~san in the Karate Kid movies. But what many people fail to remember is that he also portrayed Eugene Martone in the film classic, Crossroads (1986). In this movie, Macchio’s character leaves behind his comfortable life and ventures out in search of the Blues. Now is that just an eerie coincidence, or what?

Dance Review: Sunflower Parade

What is it with these parents all thinking that their children somehow possess some great artistic talent? I was basically coerced by a relative into attending a performance of Sunflower Parade on Saturday at a local church where some two dozen little girls from age 3 to about 7 stumbled and tripped around each other for over one hour and thirty five minutes. All of the parents were saying “how cute”, and clapping and cheering as video cameras whirred away. I am sorry parents, but not only were the girls not talented, but most of them were not even “cute”. These poor children are not served by their parents setting them up for a big fall when they later learn that they are not gifted dancers and no amount of practice is going to change that.

Rating: 6 stars out of 30

Dance Review: Nevermind

Those people in Seattle sure are proud of their Grunge. So now, according to this article, some dance company there thinks that they can enhance the Nirvana experience by leaping around and I guess that will evoke the spirit of Kurt Cobain’s genius or solitude or something. Yeah, that will happen. I checked out their website and the dancers don’t even look the slightest bit grungy to me. If you want to see grungy looking dancers, check out a Blues Danse performance.

I have not seen it but I can’t recommend it.

Rating: 6 stars out of 30

President's Day Performance Postponed

I am sorry to report that this year's Potable Water's One-Man President's Day Blues Danse Experience has been postponed until further notice. The extravaganza has been called off for this coming Monday, due to the fact that my sound engineer and back-up dancer, Matt Samfort, has turned out to be as unreliable as a drunken tap dancer. He says that he has sustained a work-related injury at the dry cleaners but how hard can it be to push the button on a boom box, turn off the lights and maybe dance a few numbers behind me? So I guess the kindly folks over at Golden Days Retirement RV Park will be sitting around in the rec center on Monday afternoon with nothing to do and wondering why the show isn't starting. Thanks Matt. Way to let everyone down!

Blues Danser’s Story Finally To Be Told

According to Reuters, Blues Danse genius Vanilli is finally going to be recognized in a Universal film biography. Vanilli was half of the famous musical duo Milli Vanilli. The Duo’s story would not be worth telling without the amazing back story of the struggles and personal sacrifices made by a young Vanilli as he mastered the art of Blues Danse. Tragically, the producer who created the superstar couple of the early 90’s did not allow Vanilli to incorporate these moves into the mind-numbing, suburban dance routines that they performed in videos and on stage. The article makes no mention of how the Blues Danse chapter of Vanilli’s life will be highlighted in the film, however anyone but a total moron would make this a central theme. I look forward to the film’s release and will post a review here at that time, but for now I am predicting a 6 star rating.

Blues Danse Defined (Part 1)

On Wednesdays we devote a little time to discuss our favorite topic, Blues Danse.

How does one define Blues Danse? As with painting and scrapbooking, it can be difficult to put into words. One must experience the Danse in order to appreciate it, and to grasp its magnificence and subtlety really requires one to participate in the Danse itself. In some ways it is simpler to say what Blues Danse is not. Here is a partial list.

Blues Danse is NOT:

• Tap dancing! (at all)
• Classical
• New Age
• Easy
• Extravagant
• Too Fast
• Too Slow
• Tap-like

That’s about it so far.